Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Ask and You Shall Receive

“Ask and you shall receive. Seek and you shall find. Knock and the door shall be opened unto you.” These words of Christ express a natural law; mainly, the world responds to those who ask. Percy Ross (1917 ~ 2001) describes this profound fact in more playful terms, “The world is full of genies waiting to grant your wishes.” If we only knew what we’re not receiving because we’re not asking, we’d surely change our behaviour.

Those of us who are married or in relationships are so because we ASKED the person of our dreams to share their life with us. So, inherently, we all know that we can realize our dreams merely by asking. And yet, after finding their mate and job, many people stop asking. As a result, they stop receiving. Their dreams are vaporized. Their progress halted. Their happiness stunted.

Why do we stop asking? Mainly because we’re afraid the person we’re asking will say no. Marcia Martin explains why such a notion is foolish: “What I point out to people is that it’s silly to be afraid that you’re not going to get what you want if you ask. Because you are already not getting what you want. They always laugh about that because they realize it’s so true. Without asking you already have failed, you already have nothing. What are you afraid of? You’re afraid of getting what you already have! It’s ridiculous! Who cares if you don’t get it when you ask for it, because, before you ask for it, you don’t have it anyway. So there’s really nothing to be afraid of.”

Another reason for people not asking for what they want is they are afraid that they are unworthy of it. The solution is to make yourself worthy. I may want to get a raise at work, but I am not automatically entitled to one merely because I put in time and carry out my responsibilities; after all, that’s what I am paid for. However, if I do more than I am supposed to and make myself a valuable member of the company, I am worthy of a raise and can now ask for one. If I’m turned down, I can ask for advice on what else I can do to EARN a raise in the future.
So, I have nothing to lose by asking. At the very least, I will gain some knowledge on how to better my chances in the future, as well as impress my superior with my ambition.

We have to learn from our children and pet dogs and cats. Don’t they live by the principle that it never hurts to ask? We need to do the same. It is essential to realize that we cannot reach our goals without the help of others. Therefore, we must ask them for their help. True, we may not get what we ask for, but we will NEVER get what we don’t ask for!

To start getting more out of life, we need to ask ourselves a series of questions. Questions like, “What do I want that I am not asking for now? What is needed to get what I want? Who can help me get what I need? What are the obstacles I need to overcome? What path of action should I take to overcome these obstacles? What are the worst and best that could happen by asking? What is most likely to happen? What am I waiting for?

Also, prepare the way by following another universal law, which is, “You only receive what you give away.” In other words, before you can expect others to respond favorably to your requests, you have to willingly cooperate with those asking for your help. Be generous and kind. This sets in motion relationships and networks that are predisposed to help you because you are worthy of it.

Need more help around the house from your spouse? Need more training to improve your job performance? Need your neighbor to stop blocking your driveway with his pickup truck? Need your doctor to explain in greater detail what your options are? Need help in doing your school report? Need to have your friend stop blabbing about the things you tell her in private? Accomplish your aims; achieve your wishes, and get what you want out of life by ASKING for it.

To maximize your chances of success, here are some pointers to keep in mind.

1. Explain your need and desire for help. Make a request, not a demand.

2. Accept refusals graciously. Thank them for their consideration. Don’t sulk. As the Russians say, “Ask a lot, but take what is offered.” Show gratitude when they help; show understanding when they don’t.

3. Don’t try to get what you want by manipulation. Don’t try to make the other party feel guilty for refusing.

4. Don’t ask others to do what you can do without their help. Show some initiative.

5. Don’t ask for advice or suggestions if all you want is to have someone agree with your preconceptions.

6. Don’t make unreasonable requests. Don’t ask someone to do what you are not willing to do for them.

7. Don’t ask God, unless you believe He is Santa Claus. God helps those who help themselves. Save your prayers for prayers of thanksgiving.

8. Don’t be vague. For example, don’t tell your coworker she isn’t cooperative enough, but be precise in explaining what you need. For example, “Mary, I need you to come to the meetings on time. And the Month’s End Report must be completed by the 27th of each month. Whenever a problem occurs, tell me about it immediately so we can resolve the difficulty and meet our deadlines.”

9. Many married couples or close friends expect their mate or friend to be a mind reader. Don’t fall into this trap. Others are NOT aware of what is going on inside your head or the emotions you are experiencing. Thoughts such as, “If he really loved me, he would know how I feel” are sheer fantasy. You are capable of an infinite range of desires, thoughts, and feelings. Even the Amazing Kreskin won’t be able to decipher them unless you reveal them. So, don’t hide your thoughts, but share them by asking for what you want.

10. Remain committed to your goals and don’t get discouraged when your requests for help are turned down. You will never lose if you never quit. Just keep trying. The stakes are high and your efforts will be rewarded, sometimes in ways that are not immediately obvious.

Asking for what you want doesn’t mean you will get everything you ask for. But it does mean you will get MORE out of life. Imagine the tragedy of the many things that are lost simply because we are not asking for them. So, let ’s reach out and grab the fruit of life, the many rewards that are ours just for the asking!

James Boehm Every Month A Million and the Daily Dose Of Good

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Practice Gratitude Exercises To Transform Your Life

Follow these steps to develop an attitude of gratitude. THE best way to raise your vibration and attract what you desire.

I can't emphasize enough how important it is to practice gratitude when you are following your path to personal development growth.

You should think of it not only as a tool for transformation but as a way of life.

Now, if you have wrapped your mind around the fact that we are all energy then you realize there is no separation and we are all connected. Everything is energy with it's own rate of vibration that attracts things of like vibrations to it. That of course includes our thoughts. And thoughts and feelings of gratitude are some of the most powerful and they allow for great positive shifts to occur.

The Top 2 Ways To Practice Gratitude

#1. BE THANKFUL IN ADVANCE: It has been said that the most powerful form of gratitude is the kind which you express in advance of your actual experience. The expression of faith that this requires allows for the most effective type of vibrational shift.

#2. FIND THINGS TO BE GRATEFUL FOR IN BAD SITUATIONS: Focus on someone you have a conflict with or on a negative emotional situation in your life. You then look for things to be grateful for in those situations. They may not be obvious, but they are ALWAYS there.
Be grateful... that you only have to deal with this person once a month, that if it weren't for this situation - you wouldn't have met a new friend, that this situation now offers an opportunity for growth...

A newer, more positive energy will come from this especially since you had to look deeper into yourself to find the gratitude.

Other Ways To Practice Gratitude


It's a good practice to take 10 minutes a day to write down things you are grateful for and that bring you joy. They can be big or small as long as you tune into the feelings of gratitude for having them in your life right now.

Be grateful for: a stress-free commute to work, a call you got from an old friend, a delicious meal, a hug from your child, a compliment you received from your boss, a great night's sleep, an invigorating workout...


As you're strolling with the kids, walking the dog, or doing your chores, look around and rattle off as many things as you can think of to be grateful for. Tell the Universe out loud what you love about your life.

Watch this video and get an idea of the things you can be grateful for. http://www.law-of-abundance-living.com/

This is something I first saw in The Secret movie. Find a special rock and keep it with you throughout the day and let it remind you to state something you're grateful for whenever you touch it. A fun new site called MessageRocks.com offers hand-picked smooth ocean rocks with inspirational messages etched into both sides. Press & hold for a 3-D view and take a look.



Write a mock letter to someone very important in your life who would be excited for your news. Tell them how grateful you are about this wonderful thing that has happened in your life. Doing this exercise will bring about intense emotions and will put you in a joyful, grateful vibration.

""Hi Julia, The most exciting thing happened to me... I couldn't wait to tell you about it. I went to the gym a few weeks ago and was working out and got to talking to the girl next to me. I told her about the new web business that I just launched and she was so interested that she interviewed me for a local newspaper article. It created tons of traffic to my website and I made some big sales too. I am SO grateful that I met her that day.""

TIP: You can even write this "as if" that something happened to try and attract it into your life.

Just make sure you practice gratitude every day. Create a routine that's easy and sustainable.
When it comes to creating and experiencing the kind of life you want, it's a law of the Universe that it will always deliver in the right time for the right vibration of your body.

So if you practice gratitude, you will energetically raise your vibration and speed up the process of attracting what you desire.

There is truly NO BETTER WAY to do that than when you are in a state of gratitude.

James Boehm Every Month A Million and the Daily Dose Of Good

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Top 7 Steps to Make Your New Year’s Resolutions Happen

There's still time to get your resolutions rolling... The first of the year gave you a blank piece of paper on which to write the next year of your life. New Year’s resolutions anyone?

The holidays may have widened your hips or piled on the credit card debt. That's why people say things like, "This year I'm definitely going to get back into my skinny jeans." Or, "I’m going to get rid of my debt and start saving once and for all." These declarations may give you an initial boost of inspiration, but most of them will soon disappear. In fact, studies show that most people's New Year’s resolutions have dropped away by February.

So what can you do to beat the odds? How can you really make your New Year’s resolutions happen? These 7 steps work to accomplish a resolution or any goal. Apply them this year, starting today, and make your resolutions come true!

1. Ask yourself: "What do I want to accomplish this year?"

As you look toward the year in front of you, what do you really want to accomplish? If you actually made your New Year’s resolutions happen, what would you gain? Look to key areas of your life for inspiration—career, family, health/fitness, money or romantic relationships. As I stated in the How to Set Goals That Stick Special Report, "Imagine that you’ve already completed the coming year with satisfaction and ease. What are you most proud of? What thrilled you the most?" From there, come up with ideas for your yearly goals.

If you’re drawing a blank, think about what you dislike in your life. On the career front, do your work hours stretch into the evening? Do you want to stop missing out on family dinners and outings? From a health/fitness point of view, are you tired of feeling low energy every day? Are the daily trips to the office vending machine taking their toll? Frustration and dissatisfaction can be great motivators for change.

By viewing what you want to move toward, or sorting through what you want to move away from, come up with several possible goals. Then narrow down your list and pick one to three final goals. Make them important. If you could only achieve three things this year, what would they be?

2. Ask why? Why did you pick these goals?

What's behind them? Connect to what's really driving you. As I said in my Special Report, "Set meaningful goals, not just any old goals." What goals would be meaningful to you this year? Be as specific as possible.

For example, if you want to save money, go beyond saying, "I want to save money because it would be great to have some extra cash." Wanting more money for the sole sake of having more money isn’t meaningful enough to keep most people going. Connect to something deeper. What's behind your desire for more money? Here’s one possibility: "I've always wanted to own a home. It’s time to take action toward that dream. I'm tired of renting and I want to lay down roots for my family. I also want to move to a nicer area that is safe and close to good schools for my children. I will use the money I save this year toward a down payment. I can definitely cut back on spending to buy a house!" When you clarify the "why" behind what you want you’ll feel much more driven and connected to your goal.

If you have no idea why you want something, dig deeper. Ask, "Why is this important to me? What would I get out of that? What would my family/friends/coworkers get out of that?" You can also ask another person or coach for insight.
If you keep coming up with nothing, maybe you need to reconsider whether you want that particular goal at all. Create a goal that has some passion behind it. Give yourself reasons to strive toward your aspirations.

3. Follow the "do what by when" formula.

Most New Year’s resolutions fail because they remain vague or wishful. Goals such as "I want to lose weight" aren’t tangible and will be difficult to make happen. If weight loss is a goal of yours (and you already know why you want to weigh less), make it specific. For example, "I want to lose 20 pounds by May 30, 2008." Using the "do what by when" formula clarifies exactly what you intend to do (lose 20 pounds) by a specific month, day and year (May 30, 2008). Then you can measure your success every time you jump on the scale.

Speaking of measuring, make sure you can count, measure or touch your progress. The above weight goal, for example, can be measured in pounds—20 to be exact. How will you know when you've met your goal? Define it in a measurable way. Do you want a promotion of 10% or 20% this year? Do you want to save $1,000 or $10,000? How much money do you need to earn each month to pay your bills? Without ways to measure your goals, they remain wishes.

Financial advisor and founder of Insideout Investing, Anna Choi, says, "You can manifest your goals better when they are specific, measurable, time-bound and achievable." To do that, apply the "do what by when" formula to quantify your goals. Then, to make those goals achievable, do the "rubber band" test.

4. Do the "rubber band" test.

The trick is to set ambitious goals that will stretch you without making you “snap.” In the November 2007 article, ''Top 3 Must-Do’s Before the New Year," I said, "Like a rubber band stretched between two fingers, the goal should have the right mix of tension and flexibility. Put enough stretch in your goal to make it enticing yet with a touch of slack to make it doable." Setting a challenging goal will encourage you to try harder and to go for it.

Anna Choi agrees, "It's important to set a goal you believe can happen. But it also has to be a stretch goal, versus a goal so ridiculously huge you feel deflated even looking at it." Peak performance comes from doing something tough but possible given your time frame.

A common New Year’s resolution is to learn a new language. But unless they are multi-lingual or languages come easily, most people won’t achieve this in a year. Try something more doable, such as “to attend Spanish 1 and Spanish 2 at the local community college by December 31, 2008.” You’ll still be working toward your long-term goal of being fluent by allowing yourself to get started. Overly lofty goals will have you giving up at the starting line. Ambitious goals will give you a challenge but allow you to get going right away.

5. Put your goals in writing.

Have you written down your goals for the New Year? If you haven’t, you're not alone. Research shows that in the U.S. fewer than 1% of people write down their goals. Why is this important? A noted 1953 study at Harvard University evaluated how many graduates had clear, specific goals in writing and supported with an action plan. Although the classmates being assessed were obviously bright, very few of them set goals. In fact, only 3% of graduates put their goals in writing.

What happened to this 3%? When questioned 20 years later, it turned out that this small group had had greater success than the rest. Those 3% of graduates who had put their goals in writing had built greater fortunes than the entire remaining 97% of alumni.

Taking a moment to put your goals in writing is worth it. Try it yourself. Put pen to paper (or fingers to key pad). The act of writing will cement your goals in your mind. It can also help you clarify your goals, think about them in a new light and direct your energy toward ways to make them happen. Display your written goals somewhere visible and review them daily. Post them on the corner of your computer desktop and put them on your refrigerator. Keep them alive and create a plan around each one.

6. Create a plan.

You know what your goals are. They’re clearly written with deadlines. Now go beyond wishes and hope to put meat on each of your goals with a solid plan. Your plan answers the question: "How will I make this happen?" For example, if your goal is to save $10,000 by October 31, 2008, set a plan for saving $1,000 per month. What systems will you put in place to achieve this? Will you have the money automatically deducted from your paycheck and deposited into your retirement account? Will you cut back on buying clothing or eating out to reserve cash for savings?

Create milestones for each month. What’s the main thing you want to accomplish toward your goal in January? in February? in March? Then break each month down further. Underneath those milestones define specific actions needed to achieve them. Map out exact steps that are time-bound within the month. Put them in your schedule.

Celebrate small achievements along the way. If you've saved $2,000 by February (and have never saved money before), bravo! Take time to toast your progress. Let yourself know that you’re on track and let that progress motivate you to keep going. Getting even one dollar closer to your goal is better than adding one more dollar to your debt.

7. Take action… right away.

The most important thing is to begin. Never leave a planning or goal-setting session without taking at least one tangible action. Without action, your goals can’t take flight.

You’ve selected your top one to three goals for the year. You know why they are important in your heart of hearts. You've committed them to writing, and you have a plan. Way to go! Now keep going. Take that final step—action.

Start right away with at least one action you can take toward your goal today. Consider the goal "to lose 20 pounds by May 30, 2008." What small step can you take today toward that goal? For example, you schedule your first appointment with a trainer. Or you go to the gym for 30 minutes. Or you take a brisk 20-minute walk. Pick something so easy it would be almost impossible to fail. Stand up and take that single action.

Use your plan to plug action into your yearly, monthly, weekly and daily schedule. Look for consistent blocks of time when you can work toward your goal. It takes discipline. Life will get in the way. But staying the course will let you reap the rewards. Successful people know this. That’s why they make it a priority to focus and act on their goals regularly. You can do it too. When you arrive at your destination you’ll feel a great sense of satisfaction in your focused effort to make your goal happen.

James Boehm Every Month A Million and the Daily Dose Of Good.

Monday, January 4, 2010

Make your New Year's Resolution happen!

Want to make your New Year’s resolutions actually happen next year? This article will show you how to turn your New Year’s resolutions into goals and achieve them.

New Year’s resolutions are a great way to move your life ahead. They give you hope for the New Year plus direction for your life. New Year’s resolutions seem to bring out more creative, adventurous ideas, than if we told ourselves to make a list of goals for next year. In fact many more people make New Year’s resolutions than set goals. 32% of people 54 years old and up make New Year’s resolutions, and for the 18 to 34 year old group the figure is 57%. Whereas only about 5% of the population regularly set goals. Unfortunately, most New Year’s resolutions fall by the wayside within a week.

You had some great ideas for New Year’s resolutions, so how do you stop them from falling by the wayside?

The first step is to write all of the New Year’s resolutions down and analyze them. Are any of them conflicting, such as making more money versus taking more time off? Next look at them and ask if they are really achievable. Do they call for physical feats you can never match? Do they seem silly now that you see them written out? So cull out the resolutions don’t past muster so far. Now you have a list that you can work with.

Next make sure you don’t have more than five resolutions on your list, as more than that will probably dilute you efforts. Concentrate only on the highest priority items.

The next step is to rewrite the resolutions into goals, as be as specific as possible. It is safe to call them goals now, as the part where we need to be the most creative in generating ideas for objectives is past. You had a resolution to make more money next year, so exactly how much do you want to earn next year, when will you earn it, how will you earn it, where will you earn it and so on. Make sure every goal is totally clear and it gives you some stretch, yet is still achievable. .

Once the goal is clear, look at the goal and make sure it is measurable, so you can track your progress, through feedback and then adjust accordingly.
Next you need a plan for each of the goals. Break down the steps needed to be done, in the order they are to be done. Once again, be specific, list who will do what and when. It also helps to assign a dollar and time budget to the steps so you understand what is involved.

Here is the biggest step. Take Action. Start to work you plan.

Once the plan is underway, start to measure your progress and correct what you need to as you move along.

As you move along on your plan, use affirmations as visualization to help you keep motivated. Affirmations are positive statements, starting with “I am” that describe you achieving your goal.

For instance if your goal is to make $100, 000 next year, each day, say out loud “I am a person who is earning $100,000 this year. Visualizations are guided daydreams showing you actually attaining your goal and should also be done daily.

Take setbacks in stride; turn them into comebacks by learning what went wrong, making adjustments and moving on. Don’t give up on a goal, if your timetable is thrown off. It the goal is still something you want, just believe it is better to achieve success late, than never at all.

While having New Year’s resolutions and goals are great, and achieving them is even better, there is an even better reason for setting them. The major reason for setting a goal is for you to become the person that can accomplish it. How you become a better person will always be of far greater value than what you get. The ultimate reason for setting goals is to become the person that will achieve them.

So start listing your New Year’s resolutions right now, regardless if you have been naughty or nice this year. You are on your way to making next year, your dream year. Happy New Year.

James Boehm Every Month A Million and the Daily Dose Of Good.