Faith or Fear-Which one will you choose?

Each time in my life that I have embarked to start a new endeavor there is at some point in the beginning a moment where I feel a cold chilling sting. This sting I am referring to is the fear of failure. Perhaps some of you reading this have never had that problem, and you just go from one business to the next with your chest out conquering the world. This article is NOT for you. There are many people that experience the fear of failure at one point or another in their lives, and some people live with it indefinitely. This article IS for you.

If you do not take ownership of and conquer your fear early on it will debilitate you causing your biggest fears to become a reality. There are a few short truths that I am about to share with you to aid you in your quest of conquering fear. First, you have to accept the fact that Fear is a spirit as the Bible states in 2 Timothy 1:7, “For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, of love and of a sound mind.” The opposite of fear is faith which is also a spirit. In fact, one could define fear as the expectation of something bad whereas faith could be defined as the expectation of something good.

That is an over simplified definition of either term, but let me explain. One individual may be afraid of dogs and when meeting a new dog, is afraid because they are expecting to be bitten, whereas another individual who loves dogs, has faith that the dog will be friendly. You see? Your fear of failure isn’t that you are failing now. It is from the expectation or at least a concern that you will fail, and the fact of the matter is that fear and faith being spirits cannot coexist in the same vessel. You will be in submission to one or the other.

I realize that all of that was deep but the way to cure your fear isn’t deep at all. The thing that cures fear is simple…ACTION cures fear. Whatever you are afraid of, do that thing over and over and you will no longer be afraid of it. If you have a fear of failure then go to work and work hard until the fear goes away. In this case your success would chase fear away. Whichever spirit you submit to will determine the outcome of your expectations. Faith is God’s activator and fear is Satan’s activator. Which one will you choose?

God Bless,
James Boehm

How To Believe In Yourself

If you have been beat down long enough, believing in yourself can seem impossible. When you have had people in your life who do not lift you up, you pretty much take over for them when they are not there. You proceed to discount your skills and abilities based on what other people have said. You are doing a great disservice to yourself and giving your power to someone else. To reach your goals in this life, believing in yourself is extremely important if you want to get anywhere. Those assumptions about who you are become a way of life. You will stay stuck in these patterns until you change the way you think.

Here are some simple ways to start learning how to believe in you:

1) Try Even When You Still Think You Can't Do It

Because you have pattern of not believing in yourself, this will take a little work. Make a vow to yourself today that you will try your best at any opportunity that comes your way. It does not matter if you have fallen on your face before or whether you think it's even possible. The important thing is to pledge to yourself that you will try no matter what the outcome may be. The worst thing to do to yourself is to assume you can't do it before even trying. Tell yourself right now that any effort to do better is not a waste of your precious time.

2) Establish Evidence For The Assumptions

Get some paper and start a list. List every one of those things you really believe about yourself and your abilities or the lack of them. List them whether they are large or small. Once you have that list go through each assumption and examine it. Ask yourself, "Is this true? What is the proof?" Then go and do whatever it is you feel you cannot. It does not matter if you do it better than anyone else. It only matters that you DO.

3) Recognize The Possibilities

A constant onslaught of self-defeating assumptions obviously puts you in the place of believing you cannot succeed. This goes back to the people in your life who have impressed their own beliefs on you. A silly bunch of girls in high school told you that you were fat and no one would ever want you. Guess what you have been doing since? Saying that same self-defeating comment to yourself. It is time to push beyond what you believe are your capabilities. This is a scary thought. It also will be a step in the direction of finding the belief in you. The assumptions you have about yourself may not be true. You have simply accepted these assumptions as truth without proof. Consider all the possibilities of each situation. Challenge the assumptions and have an open mind to the possibility that you could be wrong!

With every success, whether large or small, the belief in yourself will grow. That will be the push you need to keep stepping outside your comfort zone and attain the accomplishments you truly deserve.


James Boehm

WHEN ONE DOOR CLOSES IN LIFE, ANOTHER DOOR WILL OPEN

Helen Keller the famous American writer once said, “When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.”

This quote could not be more true in my life, and I’m sure many others. As I’ve had time to reflect upon my life these past days, I’m happy to see where I’ve been, yet I am more happy to see where I am going. In the past, I used to always focus on what didn’t happen in my life, what should have been, or what could have been, thus leaving me discouraged. A lot of us, like me before, put so much of our focus everyday on pass failures. It could be failures in our relationships, our decisions, our career choices, or mistakes we have made which are we are not able to fix. Even though we know that we can’t change the past, we still dwell on it, letting it plague us like a virus that never leaves our mind and emotions. But, if we always focus on the past doors that have closed, we will become blind to the open doors and opportunities that may come our way.

In the past, I used to get so down on myself about every thing that didn’t go my way. I would ask God why? I would throw fits and rages when life didn’t turn out the way I thought it should have. Or, I would become depressed and go into bouts of self-pity, self-rejection and self-hatred. Being an over achiever I would become extremely critical of myself if I felt like I was the cause of my failures. Yet, now that I am older and I can look back at a lot of my earlier mistakes as a young adolescent, I can see how every mistake, every disappointment and failure has led me to become a better man.

With time we become wiser. With time we learn to learn from our mistakes. With time we can see things in retrospect and appreciate every experience, good or bad, for what it is. With time, we can begin to appreciate ourselves. With time we realize there is no use holding on to old remorse’s and thoughts of “I wish I could have, or would have, done things this way or that way.” Instead, we can make the choice now to not repeat our past failures, recognize we are not the same person, and be open to change. We have to let go of what we can’t control and stop focusing on the past closed doors. If we do this, we can become aware of the present blessings in our lives that we may have been missing all along and walk through a new door of happiness.

Until we let go of the old thing we are holding onto, we cannot be hands free to receive the new thing God desires to bless us with. MOVE ON! I felt like I had to say that loud and clear to whoever is reading this column… MOVE ON from the past and into the new. Don’t let your past mistakes, regrets or disappointments hold you back from experiencing the fullness of life and all the goodness it can bring! I’m excited about my future, I feel like I’m maturing as a man and I know that what is in store for me in the coming days can only be even better than what I have experienced before. Not because the past was bad, but because right now I am wiser, more ready and in touch with whom I really am to receive God’s very best! Unless, we choose to move forward from past closed doors, we won’t know what is on the other side of the new doors that await us. I’m nervous, a bit afraid, but full of faith and heart wide open to experience the new, so should you!

God bless,
James Boehm

Change your life - today is a brand new day!

Do you want to change your life for the better? Do you want to own more of your personal power, live in the present moment, and move towards your dreams?

You can start moving towards your dreams right now. Today is a brand new day and you can be or do anything you want. Start by asking yourself this question: "Who do I want to be today?" Then decide what action steps you will take to do it! It could be as simple as, "I want to be more loving" and then you show someone important how much you love them.

Think about how empowering it is to live your dreams every single day. You can walk through this life with fulfillment and inspiration as you step into your ideal self and move towards your goals and dreams. You have a wonderful, beautiful energy because when you live your dreams you raise your vibration to match your higher self. What are all the qualities you want to embody? When you see your ideal self, how does he or she feel, think and act? Can you start being that person, right now?

If you want to change your life, then what better time to start than right now, with this brand new day? If you let the past hold you back or live in the future then you are keeping yourself out of your personal power. Only you can decide when to let go of the past, trust the future, and start living in the now.

What are your dreams and goals? What can you do today to move towards them? It can be anything, big or small, (and it can be easy!!) but action is required to make your dreams come true. Are you really serious about changing your life? Do you really want to be fulfilled and powerful? Then what can you do today to live your dreams?

Whatever you want for your life is yours for the taking. Are you holding yourself from your dreams by living in the past or dreaming too much of the future? If so, think about why this is. Are you afraid of success or failure? If so, can you act in spite of your fear? Everyone has fear- it never goes away. The courageous act even in the face of fear, not because it isn't there.

Change your life today. Be your dream self. Simply affirm that you are the person you dream of being, and then be it. Show someone how much you love them. Be generous with others. Take on one small action today to move towards your dreams. If not now, when?

Change your life today. There is no greater act of personal power than to move towards your dreams. It is really quite easy to do this, and so much fun! If you don't feel confident, no problem. Just fake it 'till you make it.

James Boehm

Wherever You Are, Be There

One of the major reasons why we fail to find happiness or to create unique lifestyle is because we have not yet mastered the art of being.

While we are home our thoughts are still absorbed with solving the challenges we face at the office. And when we are at the office we find ourselves worrying about problems at home. We go through the day without really listening to what others are saying to us. We may be hearing the words, but we aren't absorbing the message. As we go through the day we find ourselves focusing on past experiences or future possibilities.

We are so involved in yesterday and tomorrow that we never even notice that today is slipping by. We go through the day rather than getting something from the day.

We are everywhere at any given moment in time except living in that moment in time.

Lifestyle is learning to be wherever you are. It is developing a unique focus on the current moment, and drawing from it all of the substance and wealth of experience and emotions that it has to offer.

Lifestyle is taking time to watch a sunset. Lifestyle is listening to silence. Lifestyle is capturing each moment so that it becomes a new part of what we are and of what we are in the process of becoming. Lifestyle is not something we do; it is something we experience. And until we learn to be there, we will never master the art of living well.

Present Moment

How can one create anew in the moment, without reference to the past or the future? In this metaphor of surfing the wave and staying over your feet, we are talking about staying rooted where you ARE -- in the present moment -- rather than in the "past" (where you have been) or the "future" (where you are going). If you think about it, all fear derives from past experience being projected onto the future. When things arise in your present moment that remind you of something from the past, you can easily project that the past experience will repeat itself in the moments that follow the time of remembering that past. This is when you feel fear. It's inner talk that says, "It was like this before, so it will be like this again." If you experienced pain in the past, you expect it will be painful again. That is where the fear comes in. You want to avoid the pain. "I'm afraid that if this moment goes the way it went before, I'll experience what I experienced before, and I don't want to do that again."

The answer to this is to cut through the cords of memory, to interrupt the inner talk by saying out loud, "That was then. This is now." Boom! You are back in the present, able to choose anew in the present moment. When you say the word "now," you bring your attention into the present. Say "NOW" out loud, right now. Feel NOW. What is really happening NOW? Not what happened before, not what MIGHT happen later. What is really happening NOW? Do you see how you are in the habit of scaring yourself? Cultivate the practice of living NOW. Live each moment as the only moment that exists. NOW is the only place you can create anything. NOW is the only place you can choose anything. NOW is all you ever really have.

When we say the word "moment," it will be useful to define what we mean. A moment is an "event" that arises from the matrix of Infinite Mind. It contains everything within it for its natural fulfillment and completion. It is not measured by minutes, seconds, or hours. It is a unit of experience that may be very short or go on for some time. You can FEEL when a moment begins. You can FEEL when it completes. Every moment has a beginning, a middle, and a conclusion, like a phrase in speech or music. Think of it entering into your field of awareness, swelling into its fullness, and then receding as it completes. There is a wavelike quality to a moment. A wave emerges from the ocean, swells, moves forward, and then resolves back into the ocean. Just so with a moment. It emerges from the ocean of consciousness that is the Mind of the Creator. It swells upward into your perceptual field, and moves forward, then ebbs from your experience as it completes. There is background and foreground, and there are different waves overlapping. In the past, you were only peripherally aware of the background, as your attention was captured by the foreground, but now your senses will be broadened and deepened until you are like a bowl containing ALL of it -- all of the ocean and all of the waves upon its surface. You will be aware of all of it simultaneously and be able to move your attention to whatever you feel called to pay attention to, at will.

James Boehm

17 Way's To Love Yourself and Build Your Self Esteem

I’ve compiled a list on how to love yourself for readers who are facing difficulty knowing what to do in boosting their own self esteem. When I first began to be aware that I need to love myself first, before I can develop any meaningful relationships with others, I realised that I did not know where to start.

This was a surprise to me then as I would have thought I’d be an expert on love and relationships by then. After all, as I recalled, in my younger days, I’ve spent much time looking for the best spouse or romantic partner. But I soon realised that my search was meant to fill the void or emptiness I had inside. Finding a good relationship with myself seemed to be an even harder task! However, as things turned out, I realised that I failed miserably in my early relationships because I had insufficient or little self love.

If you’ve suffered from low self esteem, then it goes to show that you are lacking in self love. You may even find it difficult to even search your heart for that little bit of love you have for yourself. I dare say that your mind has been so ingrained with self sabotaging thoughts for the longest time, that loving yourself sounds unnatural to you.

However, nothing is going to happen if you do not make a conscious decision. And that includes Attracting Abundance. When you don’t love yourself, you are basically telling the Universe that you are unworthy or undeserving of any love or positive outcomes that have the same vibrational match as love.

Learning to love yourself starts with making a conscious decision, an intention to become happy and lead a fulfilled life. When you do not love yourself and suffer from low self esteem, you can find that it impossible to ever reach the potential that you suspect you have.

“Love yourself first and everything falls into line.”Lucille Ball quotes (American radio and motion-picture actress and comedy star, 1911-1989)

When you make a decision to love yourself, you are really saying that you want to come alive. You accept that you are responsible for the outcomes that you experience in your life and would like yourself to shine from living a fulfilling life.

So if you’ve decided on loving yourself but are as equally stumped on how to love yourself, as I was back then, here are 17 ways which I believe can be helpful:

1. Fall in love with yourself. Think about what makes you You. Just like a flower that needs watering to grow, learn to nurture yourself in every way. Love yourself for all the good that you see and accept your flaws and the fact that you are imperfect. This does not meant that you do not learn to change from your shortcomings; instead, you are being gentle and kind to yourself for all your flaws. Look in the mirror and fall in love with the reflection that is You.

“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.”Oscar Wilde quotes (Irish Poet, Novelist, Dramatist and Critic, 1854-1900)

2. Eliminate Self Criticism. Do you often berate yourself over the tiniest thing? Is there a little voice inside your head that often tells you that you are no good because you are stupid or make mistakes. If you find that you criticise yourself often, make an effort to stop the self criticism.

“I CAN is 100 times more important than IQ.” — unknown

3. Be Kind And Positive. When you start to think kindly and positively about yourself, the love you have for yourself just grows. Make it a habit to praise yourself everyday, while in the front of the mirror. Because of such thoughts, you naturally undertake empowering actions that support your development.

4. Acknowledge Your Effort. It’s not always about winning or having success in everything that you do. Many times, it is the effort that counts! Acknowledge that you’ve done your best, even if you have failed to produce tangible results.

Bring Your Dreams to Life!

5. Let Go Of Worry. Loving yourself requires you to let go of your worry. It is a horrible way to live a life filled with constant worrying. I can attest to that! Worry does not help in any way. It cannot, on its own, make things happen. Only wise actions can! So instead of worrying, spend time thinking about what you can do to help in the situation. If the situation is beyond your control, then ask the Universe for your desired outcome and let things work out on their own.

Things will come to be, if they are meant to be.

“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.” — Epictetus quotes (Greek philosopher associated with the Stoics, AD 55-c.135)

6. Trust Yourself. Have confidence in your abilities. Know that you have the ability to make important changes for yourself, for as long as you put your heart to it. You can also support yourself by visualizing desired outcomes.

“Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.”Benjamin Spock quotes (American Pediatrician and Author, 1903-1998)

7. Forgive Yourself. If you have made mistakes in the past that had caused you to feel less worthy, then you need to forgive yourself. All of us make mistakes; so there really is no need to beat yourself up over them. Or if you’ve been carrying around a baggage of emotional hurt because of a childhood trauma, learn to forgive yourself that it is not your fault.

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”Lewis B. Smedes quotes

8. Be Truthful To Yourself. Loving yourself requires you to be truthful about your own feelings. If you are happy, acknowledge the joy. If you are sad, acknowledge the sorrow. When you are truthful about your feelings, you do not try to lie to yourself or seek to bury your negative emotions. Instead, acknowledging what you feel provides a good guide to what your thoughts are. And as we all know, thoughts can be changed, so that healing and self growth can take place.

9. Grow Spiritually. When you spend time growing spiritually, loving yourself is an automatic thing. You become more peaceful, connected, kind, loving and compassionate. You nurture a mind that grows more beautiful by the day. How to not love yourself in the process?

10. Make Positive Affirmations Everyday. Post affirmations that can help raise your self esteem everyday. For instance, say this to yourself “I love and accept myself completely and unconditionally.” Read your affirmations out loud several times a day.

11. Express Gratitude. Express gratitude for the person that you are. For instance, cultivate an appreciation for your strengths and gifts. Also, feel a sense of gratitude that you are alive and well, and fully capable of making a difference in your life.

Bring Your Dreams to Life!

12. Nurture Your Dreams. Why deny yourself your dreams? When you nurture your dreams, you would love the life that you are leading. Every moment that you live is a joy because you are expressing yourself fully.

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. —Mark Twain

13. Boost Your Self Confidence. Make a deliberate attempt to look for opportunities that can help improve your sense of Self. For instance, if you are particularly good at doing something, set aside more time to indulge and improve your skills on it. Knowing that you have particular gifts can boost your self esteem.

14. Relax. You need to give yourself space to take breaks every now and then. If you spend your time working, without paying attention to your health, it also means that you do not love yourself well enough to take care of your own body. Fill your time with silence, soothing music and visions of beauty; anything that nourishes your Soul.

15. Have Fun. Inject some fun into your life. Life is meant to be an enjoyable. Don’t take life or yourself too seriously. If you can think of life in this manner, you automatically relax and quit worrying over things that do not matter.

16. Look After Your Body. It is important that you strengthen yourself with proper nutrition and regular exercise. Your body is a temple and you should treat it with respect, love and care. It has been found that the lack of self love is often the root causes of conditions like eating disorders, obesity or even terminal diseases.

“Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.”Jim Rohn quotes (American Speaker and Author. He is famous for motivational audio programs for Business and Life. )

17. Learn To See Beauty. When you learn to see beauty in every thing, you will also see beauty in yourself. Hence, stop to smell the flowers. Notice everything. Feel everything. The pink blush of the flowers in your garden, the greeness of the plains, the whisper of the gentle wind, or the myraid hues of an evening sky.

Here is a good affirmation to read and reflect on…..

“I am Me. In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. Everything that comes out of me is authentically mine, because I alone chose it — I own everything about me: my body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions, whether they be to others or myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. I own my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes.

Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me. By so doing, I can love me and be friendly with all my parts. I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know — but as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles and ways to find out more about me.

However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically me. If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought, and felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that which I discarded. I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me.

I own me, and therefore, I can engineer me. I am me, and I am Okay.”



James Boehm

My 10 Powerful ways to Manifest Everything You Desire in Life

Every day in every way we are manifesting the reality of the life that we see around us. Whether we know it or not, whether we like it or not, everything in our life is created by what we think, say, and do.

I believe that people can learn to manifest the life of their dreams with ease, I have come to realize that there are 10 keys that consistently make a difference in successfully and joyfully creating in an effortless flow.

An important foundation to becoming a conscious creator is to recognize that it all begins within you. Your thoughts create your emotions, your emotions lead to the actions you take, and the actions you take effect the results that you see in your life.

Another essential idea is to realize that you do NOT have to do this alone! Our lives are designed to work in harmony, like a symphony, with the powerful creative forces of the Universe that are literally standing by to delight and excite us! As you become clear on what you choose, set your intentions, focus your attention, visualize what you choose as if it has already occurred, expect your desires to be full and fulfilled, express gratitude, and move forward to take the appropriate actions in your life, you are forever free from the habits of worry, doubt, and fear.

When you tap into the power of the Universe to support and assist you in creating the life of your dreams, you almost immediately begin to experience the magic and the miracles of life and living!

Make a commitment each day to your great wealth and success, and living a life that is full of rich, wonderful, loving, fun, healthy, abundant experiences!

Here are 10 keys that will support you in consciously creating the life you love to live:

1. Choose a Higher Power that absolutely and completely LOVES and ADORES you, that always has your best interests at heart, and that wants you to enjoy all the riches of this life.

2. Choose powerfully and positively to create a road map for your success. Create a vivid vision of what you choose to move towards, rather than what you want to move away from. Be definite, clear, and specific.

3. Maintain a prosperity consciousness each and every day. Do not allow thoughts of lack, limitation, or competition to enter into your mind. Allow only the truth that there is limitless abundance in the Universe for everyone, including you!

4. Create and reinforce powerful, positive, supportive beliefs every day in what you think, say, and do.

5. Stay focused on your vision of what you know to be the truth. What you focus on expands. Where you place your attention is where you set your intention.

6. When you choose a financial truth, always state “at least” or “or more”. For example, “I am now earning $10,000 or more each month in passive income.” When you choose a material truth, always say “or better”. For example, “I am now driving my cherry red Mercedes-Benz 500SL with cream-colored interior or better”. Stay open to the limitless abundance of the Universe!

7. Be open to receiving in every area of your life. Expect the gifts, the miracles, and the magic. Expand and open more to joy, love and abundance.

8. Indulge yourself in gratitude for every thing in your life.

Every experience, every relationship, every penny in the street is a gift. Acknowledge the gifts and the blessings that are showered on you each and every day.

9. Be generous with yourself and others! What you give is always returned to you multiplied, and this is a confirmation to the Universe that you are ready, willing and able to receive.

10. Be present for the present. When you’re in the past, you’re in guilt and regret. When you’re in the future, you’re in fear. When you’re present in the present, you have the choice to create limitless wealth and abundance.

Manifest your Vision using the Law of Vibration

Science and Metaphysics agree. The essence of all things is vibration. Science reveals that everything in the manifest universe is ultimately composed of packets of energy; quantized units vibrating at specific frequencies. Esoteric wisdom reveals that in the beginning, all things were created through sound (i.e. vibration); whether it be the "OM" of Eastern mysticism or the "Word"/Logos of Western spirituality.

Our thoughts, feelings and actions also have their own particular rates of vibration. These vibrations will set up resonance with whatever possesses identical frequency. In other words, your thoughts are inseparably connected to the rest of the universe.

This is why it is so essential to be a close observer of yourself. As you think, feel and act, so you create the primary vibration of your being. This fundamental vibration then creates resonance with identical vibration frequencies in the universe. The result is an attraction of circumstances, people, challenges and opportunities in exact vibrational resonance with your own dominant vibration frequency.

This principle lies at the heart of visualization techniques, affirmations and the whole personal development movement. When you visualize and repeat affirmations, you are helping to tune your very being to a specific vibrational frequency on the inner planes. Once that task is achieved, your mind comes into vibrational resonance with the object of your desires. Being now of the same frequency, this object (or goal) is inevitably attracted into your life.

However, for such methods to work, it does imply that you have changed your core vibration. This is very often the problem AND explanation as to why such techniques seem to fail for so many people. Over the course of many years, your inner conditioning is created from the habitual thoughts, feelings and actions that you engage in. This forms your self-image and creates the level of self-esteem you feel. It shapes the way you conceptualize the world you live in, as well as the way you respond to it. It is how you interpret your life experiences.

If a person simply mouths affirmations or writes goals out, without having touched the deep bedrock of their long-term conditioning, such activities will not have much effect. This is because the dominant vibration has not changed. You cannot go against what your self-image, and your predominant conditioning, say you are.

Thought is where it all begins. As your conscious mind dwells habitually on thoughts of a certain quality, these become firmly imbedded within the subconscious mind. They become the dominant vibration. This dominant vibration sets up a resonance with other similar vibrations and draws them into your life. This is easier to understand if you consider that from the metaphysical view, the whole universe IS MIND.

Hence, to draw what you wish into your life, you should begin with the mind, and make it your primary focus. Most people do things the other way around, and come up with practical techniques to generate their desires, and then go out and try them. However, when these methods are not in tune with your dominant vibration, then you will have great difficulty making the desired results come to pass. You will also feel most uncomfortable if they do. You have trained your mind in a certain way, you have set the thermostat at a certain level, and now you are trying to exceed the limits you have set upon yourself by sheer force.

The trap most people fall into is that they condition their future with expectations from their past. It's like driving with your eyes fixed on the rear view mirror the whole time. You cannot see where you are going because you are too busy looking back on past history. Is it any wonder that, for most people, the future DOES closely resemble the past?!

The problem is that, by focusing continually on what you have become as a result of past conditioning, you guarantee that you draw this same dominant vibration into the future. This is also why your desired future can seem so far away from you. It is vibrating at an alien frequency and hence, in a real sense, it IS very far away.

Instead, you have to first change the dominant vibration within. Once your dominant vibration is in harmony with what you seek, the latter must literally be "attracted" to you without excessive striving! It will seem easy in comparison to what came before. In a very real sense, you have to become what you seek on the inside before you can ever have it in physical reality.

There are several ways to gradually change the dominant vibration of your inner being, and begin to resonantly attract what you seek. One important thing to do is to have a clear vision of your life as you want it to be; completely independent of the circumstances of your present or past. Lack of absolute clarity about their desired future could well be the number one reason why people fail in life.

You are creating something new from the universal intelligence, and drawing it into your reality. You do NOT have to base this upon the past, your perceived weaknesses, or anything else that derives from your limited self-image.

A good way to gain clarity is to write down in detail the attainment of what you seek. What would it look like? How would you feel if you achieved it? What difference would it make to your life? It may take you days, or even weeks, to create this vision, but it is time well spent.

By creating a vision of your desired state and putting energy into it regularly, you use mind power to shape the very stuff of creation. You create this imagined "reality" in your mind to the point where your subconscious actually believes it to be physical reality and goes about making it so. It will attract the circumstances, the people, and the opportunities you need to bring about the vision you have created.

If you are doubtful about this, consider for a moment that you are doing this anyway. The only difference is that you may be unaware you are doing it. If so, your overall vibration is incoherent, and hence your results fluctuate wildly. By becoming conscious, you take conscious control of the creative process and can learn to manifest at will.

Another way to change your vibration rate is to act "as if". If you had already attained what you seek, how would you think and act? Well, start thinking and acting that way right now. Again, this helps to impress the dominant vibration you choose upon your subconscious mind. Again, you have been doing this all your life anyway. Simply take conscious deliberate control of the process from now on. For instance, Cary Grant is known to have said:

"I acted like Cary Grant for so long, I became him."

Taking time to meditate regularly on the truth that all is vibration, seeing this reality in all is myriad guises, will also help reinforce it upon your mind - both conscious and subconscious. You will begin to believe it, and what you believe is what you act upon.

The reason most people achieve very little in comparison to what they are capable of is because they have no vision for the future whatsoever. Focused, single-minded concentration upon a vision you seek to create is what will actually cause it to happen. You have to read your description every day (preferably twice or more), and then vividly imagine it. Begin to live that reality now in your mind's eye, and you make its future manifestation all the more rapid. Do not even worry about how it will happen. Just do your part and let the universe, through the law of vibration, do the rest.

James Boehm

My Four Steps to Get Rid of Negative Thoughts

Negative thoughts are a thousand times more addictive than drugs. My four step proven approach to help get rid of negative thoughts is presented here. Using this technique you can get rid of negative thoughts and make yourself a happier person.

Negative thoughts are a thousand times more addictive than drugs। Over time they become so that you cannot distinguish a thought as being separate from you.

Many mental health professionals and psychiatrists like Professor Aaron Beck of the University of Pennsylvania, who invented the Beck Hopelessness Scale, believe that depression is due to negative views towards the self, world, and especially the future. In his lifelong experience of working with depressed patients, Professor Beck found that they experienced streams of negative thoughts that habitually pop up spontaneously out of nowhere.

You can get rid of negative thoughts. There is hope for you. Others have done it, so can you!
There is a priceless and proven technique, which has helped lots of people get rid of negative thoughts that plague the mind. When you learn to get rid of negative thoughts you become a more positive person, who is happier. All the advice you get about “Think positive”, just doesn’t work if you can’t get rid of negative thoughts first. Using the following method you can get rid of much negativity in your life so that you can think positive.

So, here’s the method, step by step.

1. Become Aware

This is the first step. You have to recognise that you’re having a negative thought. The sure sign of a negative thought is that it lowers your energy level. Then it can also make you feel gloomy and bitter so that you can’t see any good in anything.

2. Label It

Take a good look at your thought. “I’m experiencing a negative thought now.” Tell yourself like this. Then you decide that you will not let this negative thought take control of you. Visualize the thought going away from you or going into the ground. Once a day, find a place where you can sit alone quietly for a few minutes. Even a toilet will do if you have no other place. Visualize that you dump your negative thoughts onto a dead tree, a rock or the sea. Tell yourself that you don’t want them anymore.
After doing this for a few days, you’ll notice a sudden change. Suddenly you’ll begin to feel your energy level stop sinking and the inner gloom will stop getting gloomier. Fantastic progress until now, so congratulate yourself. Treat yourself to a nice cake and then on to the next stage.

3. Exaggerate It

Explore the negative thought and play with it। Stretch it and make it absolutely ridiculous। If you have a thought such as “I can’t go and tell my bank that I’d need to lower my monthly mortgage amount. They’d think I’m a loser”. Visualize all the people at the bank laughing out aloud so they roll on the floor pointing at you. Some of them manage to rush into the street and stop passers-by or get on the phone and call their friends and say out aloud “Can you imagine, we have a customer here who wants to lower her monthly mortgage amount!” Then everyone joins in to ridicule you, the traffic stops, TV cameras appear and they make a breaking-news alert, the president cancels his foreign trip.
As you go on doing this thought stretching, you realize the absurdity of your negative thoughts. They begin to appear bizarre and lose their glue-like grip on you. Congratulations, you have now reached breakthrough point. The miracle has started taking place. You’ve started freeing your mind.

4. Be Thankful

Notice that all your exaggerations did not actually take place। Things could have been far worse for you if they had. This is a reason to be thankful. The moment you start being thankful, a new ray of life enters and your inner gloom lights up. Things start happening to you that never happened before. Where there were only walls for you to bang your head, doors and windows appear. An end of the world disaster turns out to be an opportunity, a new beginning that you’d never have imagined. Now just relax and experience how new things come into your life in place of the old negative thoughts.


Many addiction recovery programs fail because there is no success in replacing drugs, liquor, or porn addiction with something positive and desirable. It is the same with negative thoughts. They become an addiction. So, when you start purging your mind of them, what do you put in their place? Being thankful brings a positive appreciation of your situation and you see yourself as part of a bigger picture.

You don’t have to be religious or expect archangels flapping wings and blowing fiery trumpets by your bedside as wake up in the morning। The perspective and relaxed feeling you get as you start becoming free of negative thoughts allows you to be more receptive and see opportunities. This is what is meant by “Thy will be done” in prayer. You recognize that your personal ego is rather tiny in the big picture. If you try to run everything with this tiny ego, you limit all possibilities to only those your tiny ego can imagine. Life contains infinitely more possibilities than you can imagine. Then, to your surprise, you start attracting positive thoughts.

James Boehm

Law Of Attraction Means Living In Abundance And Prosperity

The law of attraction is very simple. To accept your abundance and prosperity, you will have to be careful of what you feel, think, believe and focus on... because it will become your life. It IS your life.

After years of being taught and raised in a world full of negative thoughts and ideas... it's only natural for us to have negative tendencies. We do become what we think!

So, after saying all of that--my point is this. If you can be trained to think negatively... you can be trained to think positively. And let me be the first to tell you that it ain't easy. But for the chance of attracting abundance and having this law working in your life--is it worth the try?

It takes work to un-do years of mental brainwashing about our world, our lives and the people and situations that surrounds us daily.

Remaining Positive Takes Work
Yes, the law of attraction is something a lot of us want, but getting our minds to remain focused on positive ideas all the time is going to take some serious work.
All I can tell you is that I want this law working in my life. So I still have to remind myself about the goals I want to accomplish, and what I want my life to be. Negative thoughts still crop-up now and then but, my tendency is to squash them before they even take root.

Then I remind myself of the things I want in my life. It's a matter of what is more important. A negative thought or comment about something or someone. Or using the law of attraction to better my life. You can guess which one wins, every time.

Start By Showing Contentment In Gratitude

Try filling your life with gratitude first. Gratitude for being here to practice this universal law. Live with gratitude, breath gratitude. It's easy to be grateful. Even for the smallest things in our lives. Show your contentment in gratitude.
Then work up to being grateful for a positive outlook on life. Give people and situations, the benefit of doubt. Gratitude can and will take you far. Even to a life where using this law becomes very fruitful.

This particular law works on the principle of like energy attracts like energy. Our thoughts and emotions are energy... so basically, what we think and feel is what we're going to attract and experience in our lives.

Its orderly make-up is this... the entire cosmos is made of energy... and enegry vibrates. Everything that is made of energy vibrates at a certain level. Like vibrations attract each other... opposing vibrations repel each other.

Practicing this law (which is positive energy), will not work for a mind filled with hate, jealousy, doubt, fear and worry (which are all negative energies). They will repel each other. This is why aligning our emotional state is so important!


According To The Law Of Attraction You Attract The Emotions You Live

And you will attract whichever emotion is stronger. Let's face it. You can have some very strong emotions when it comes to hate, fear, worry, jealousy, etc.

And that's because it has been with us all our lives. It has become second nature to us. Even though we are entitled to our beliefs, it doesn't mean we can't change - it just means we're going to have to put fort an effort to change.

Do you want the attraction working in your life? Ask yourself these questions. How dedicated am I toward getting the life I want? How hard am I willing to work for it? How bad do I want to change my life?

When you answer these questions you will have your answer.

The law of attraction works, but there has to be an emotional releasing of all the negative blockages that are holding you back. Blockages that are hidden deep in your sub-concscious mind. You can't move forward with your life, if negative situations from your pass or even the present are holding you back.

James Boehm

Your Attitude Is Everything

Would you want to have an employee who is extremely good at his or her job but has a bad attitude or an average employee who has a positive attitude? Experienced CEOs understand that bad attitudes can reduce the effectiveness of their organization. Skills can be taught. Attitude is difficult to change.

People with positive attitudes are winners. They build an environment that values employees, suppliers and customers. They think positively. The words don't and can't are not in their vocabulary.

How do we identify winners? It is hard to tell by casual observation. Winners dress the same as everyone else, eat at the same restaurants and work at the same companies. Successful people come in all personality types, physical characteristics and professions. We identify them by their attitudes, behaviors and results.

Winners don't give up. The sad truth about people who give up is they are just as capable as those who don't. The main difference is their attitude.

Conscious thoughts precede actions. By choosing our thoughts, we act our way into certain circumstances. Positive attitudes help us be more productive. We are who we think we are. If we think we can, we can. If we think we can't, we can't. Attitude Defined

What is an attitude? Some say it's a mindset, a way of thinking, which is partly right. In simple terms, an attitude is a habit of thought. Usually we think of habits as behaviors; the way we do something. Habits can be mental as well. Therefore an attitude is our habitual way of looking at our world.

We develop attitude habits through conditioning. Conditioning begins at a very early age and continues throughout our lives. Sometimes our conditioning is negative, for instance a mother's admonitions to a young child. This negativity may generate many self imposed limitations.

The elephant provides a simple example. An elephant is staked to the ground. As a baby it isn't strong enough to remove the stake. Later when the elephant is full grown and could easily pull the stake, it doesn't because it "knows" it can't.

Our attitudes are the key to our health, relationships, happiness and achievements. They determine how we live and whether we succeed in life.

We control our attitudes. We alone have the responsibility to shape our life. Walt Kelly said: "We have met the enemy and they is us. We are all that is holding us back."

Attitudes of Winners

Winners have many positive attitudes. Three that are particularly important in professional lives are enthusiasm, persistence and desire.

Enthusiasm produces the confidence that announces to the world, "I have what it takes."

Enthusiasm is often misunderstood. It is frequently confused with the temporary exuberance seen at sporting events.

Long lasting enthusiasm is different. It is a confident commitment, a wholehearted action, an ardent belief. When you possess enthusiasm life is more enjoyable and work is always part play no matter how demanding. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm." Persistence is critical. Faced with difficulties, you can quit or keep pushing on. The choice is yours. But if you want to be a winner you will stay with the task and see it through.

Modern technology has taught us to expect instant gratification. We become discouraged if we have to wait. Many people give up when faced with delay. Time, dedication and commitment are always the minimum price tag we pay to complete projects that are important.

How do we project persistence? Never, never, never give up!

Intense desire creates opportunities and reveals new personal talents. Desire is much more than wishing or wanting. Desire differentiates between mature commitment and unfocused daydreaming.

Those who lack desire are always too busy to do what needs to be done. Desire pushes you to work harder in a positive sense. People with strong desire understand the pure joy of work. Their success comes not at the end of a battle, but as the culmination of a game. Every day they work towards their long range goals, reinforcing their desire to do more and do it better each day.

Desire is the attitude that transforms us from average to outstanding achievers.

Attitude and Work Environment

Many employees believe that their employer is solely responsible for the conditions that lead to job enjoyment. This is only partially true. Both the employer and employees have a shared responsibility for building positive workplace expectations.

Yes, the company and management have responsibility. Effective CEOs build a culture where people want to work and want to excel. They ensure, by leading with a Servant's Heart, that their employees feel appreciated and know the company has their personal best interests in mind.

Employees also have responsibilities. If they have a positive productive attitude they will to be happy. Conversely those who always complain create an environment that drags their coworkers down. Employees are responsible for creating their personal satisfaction on their job.

Employees with positive attitudes make their work environment a positive experience. They strive for an attitude of excellence and exude excellence in the way they work.

They go the extra mile. Instead of thinking "I did my part, someone else dropped the ball," they ensure a positive outcome by refusing to accept the alternative.

We can choose to do the minimum required or we can decide to excel. This decision to make a difference is a personal attitude that desires us to be the best we can be.

Summary
Experienced leaders understand how positive attitudes play an important part in driving the success of their organization. They build a culture where positive people can thrive and reach their personal goals. These leaders understand that when both the organization and employees reach their goals great accomplishments are possible.

People with positive attitudes are winners. They think "I can," not "I can't."

Attitudes are the mental habits through which we view our world. They are key to all the success and happiness we gain in our personal and professional lives.

People with positive attitudes overcome problems. They don't accept mediocrity. They view their work as a game helping them reach their long term goals.

People with positive mental attitudes exhibit personal leadership. Regardless of their professional responsibilities, they live their lives in a manner that inspires others.

James Boehm

My 14 Ways to Live a Better Life … Starting Today!

You’ve probably noticed that the market is saturated with self-help guides, audio books, and outrageously-priced seminars by motivational speakers. This is simply proof that most people enjoy receiving advice from others.

Here are a few “tips” that I’ve discovered on my own. Some of them are a bit humorous, but most of them are common sense. I think if you do your best to take them to heart, you’ll start to notice a clearer head and a bigger smile on your face.

1. Wake up at a reasonable hour. Everyone’s schedule is different, so if you work the night shift, your “reasonable hour” may be noon, but it’s a good idea to wake up before you have to. When I was in college I had the horrible habit of crawling out of bed ten minutes before I had to be in class. Although nearly everyone I knew at the time did the same exact thing, looking back, I see how stupid it really was. If I have a ten o’clock appointment, I wake up at seven so I can get in some exercise, take a shower, and eat breakfast before I run out the door.

2. Think of something that you have to look forward to. Once the alarm goes off and the initial confusion of “Ugh, it’s already morning!” has ended, think of something cool that you have going on in your life at the moment. Yeah, it sounds hokey, but it’s pretty helpful … and I’m sure you can think of something. Come on, anything! It can be as simple as, “Oh yeah! It’s Thursday, and that means it’s almost Friday! Weekend, here I come!” or something even better, like “The FedEx man is gonna deliver my new flat screen TV today!”

3. Look in the mirror. I’ve seen plenty of people in the movies and on TV shows who look at themselves in the mirror each morning and say things like, “You’re awesome!” or “You can do it!” before they start their day. I know this sounds relatively insane, but it helps—and I speak from experience. If you can’t tell yourself that you’re good at something and actually believe it, why should you believe anyone else who says it?

4. Take a shower and get dressed. This may be a no-brainer, but spending five or ten minutes in the shower will help clear your head and make you feel a whole lot better. Hopefully you can even find clean clothes to wear. (You know, ones that were hanging in the closet as opposed to the ones that are still in the laundry basket on the floor, wrinkled and covered in cat hair since Fluffy decided to take a nap on them.)

5. Scan the news online, read the “real” newspaper for a few minutes, or tune into the news channel on TV for a few minutes. However you get your news is up to you, but it’s a good idea to stay on top of things that are going on in the world, even though lately most of the news makes everyone angry. You shouldn’t be ignorant about issues that may affect you personally, and you’ll want to have firsthand knowledge as to what’s happening in case someone asks you about it later or tries to force their opinions on you as “the truth.”

6. Eat breakfast. Eating breakfast is a biggie that a lot of people skip, so be sure to eat something. A container of yogurt, a banana, maybe a granola bar as you run out the door … just be sure to eat. You’ll need energy to get through the morning. I like Starbucks just as much as the next guy, but a cup of coffee is not breakfast—even if it has chocolate syrup in it and whipped cream on top.

7. Make a to-do-list each day. I run my own internet business and mainly work from home (or a hotel, or wherever “home” may be at the time) so it’s a huge benefit to know what I have going on each day. Even if you spend your days at the office, you’ll still want to have some kind of agenda to follow. Set up a schedule on your Blackberry or write things down on a legal pad, but do it somehow … or you’ll wind up forgetting something important.

8. Get to work safely. Again, I only work from home, but if you drive to work – or ride your bike to work, or take the bus or train – do it safely. This is also why it’s a good idea to wake up relatively early. Rushing leads to speeding and speeding leads to tickets or fender benders … which will make you even later than you were going to be in the first place.

9. Take a deep breath and count to 3 when something starts to bug you. Co-workers, clients, things that aren’t going as smoothly as possible … there are dozens of things that can easily start to drive you nuts at the drop of a hat. You don’t want to wind up getting so frustrated with someone or something that you wind up going postal, so close your eyes and take a deep breath as you mentally count to three before you say something you may regret. Most likely, whatever’s bugging you isn’t as bad as you think it is.

10. Periodically take a break … away from your desk! Be sure to walk away from your desk every few hours. You’ll wind up getting frustrated if you sit there staring at your monitor nonstop, and your eyes will start to hurt. Getting up for five or ten minutes every three or four hours will not blow your entire day, believe me. You also need to take a break and eat lunch. Sitting at your desk with a Snickers bar that you got from the vending machine doesn’t count.

11. Tie up as many loose ends as possible before the work day ends. We all know that some days you’ll wind up working later than expected, but don’t make it a habit or your boss (or you) will start to assume that you really do work twelve hours each day even though you get paid for eight. Get as many things done as possible each day, but try to leave on time. There’s always tomorrow.

12. Eat dinner. I had to stress the importance of eating breakfast and lunch, so of course I’m going to remind you to eat dinner! And if today is one of those days you wind up putting in some overtime, get up from your desk to eat dinner. A carton of Chinese take-out every night of the week will begin to affect your waistline and your mood. Try to eat dinner with other people, if possible. Everyone should have friends. (You know, besides Fluffy the cat, even though I’m sure he’s cool.)

13. Enjoy a hobby after work. Whether it’s taking a bike ride or a walk, watching a movie, reading a novel, it’s a good idea to have some sort of hobby besides work! Spend an hour or two doing something that you enjoy to help get your mind off of work.

14. Unwind a bit before bed, and get ready to repeat the cycle tomorrow! Whether “unwinding” involves the above-mentioned hobby or something else, take time to chill out for a bit before hitting the sack. This will give you the ability to get a good night’s sleep, wake up, and do it all over again … and if this happens on Friday night, you probably don’t have to go to work tomorrow! Even better!

Yes, some of these fourteen tips might seem a bit common sense. The funny thing is they really work. I guarantee that implementing them into your daily routine will make you feel happier and more excited about the possibilities that each day brings!

James Boehm

The Law Of Giving And Receiving

The universe operates through dynamic exchange . . . giving and receiving are different aspects of the flow of energy in the universe. And in our willingness to give that which we seek, we keep the abundance of the universe circulating in our lives.

Giving: It’s what it’s all about.

One of the greatest laws is the law of giving.

It is a phenomenal law.

Give freely and happily. Always form a habit of giving cheerfully.

Give first before you receive. Whatever energy you give will come back to you in an amazing way.

You may give away your time, for example, and it comes back to you much later from an unexpected source in an unexpected form in a way that benefits you greatly. You cannot insist on a particular way and time it will come back to you, but you can be assured it will come back in the best way for you.

Give. Give. Give. And do so cheerfully and freely. It is the energy behind the giving that matters so do not give grudgingly. The law of cause and effect guarantees that you shall receive plenty for what you give.

Life is for giving…

Give what you have of your – time, money, smiles, love, compliments, anything. And you will get back what you do not have on you.

Give graciously and receive gratefully. Grace and gratitude are the energizing factors of giving and receiving.

By taking care of society and nature, you take care of yourself. Share with and give to nature and society often. It is the goose that lays the golden eggs, and it needs to be protected and nourished so that it can protect and nourish you.

Share. Give. Help others. In the proportion and to the extent that you cause others to build their wealth, so will you build your wealth.

Invest some time in and share your money with others. This enables others to build wealth. This is another great way for you to take care of society, to make it wealthy so that you may also get wealthier from it.

The Universe is all energy. Energy flows. Giving promotes this energy flow, placing you in harmony with the powers of the Universe. Whatever you wish to have, cause another being to have it first, and you will begin to have it in abundance.

Give and you will receive in multiples. For example, if you wish to have wealth, show others how to have wealth, and in an amazing way, you will soon find yourself wealthy. It is a very complicated system that works perfectly. Give cheerfully!

Share, share, share. It is an investment banked with the Universe that returns to you with amazing interest. Share gladly and genuinely.

What you wish to have, cause another to have. To have wealth and abundance cause another to have it. How do you cause others to have wealth?

Teach these lessons to your friends that are interested in wealth. Show them this book and others like it. Form study groups or mastermind circles with them. Where two or more are gathered, the whole is more than the sum of its parts.

Develop an awareness that enables you to look out for and see all opportunities where you can give something freely and cheerfully. You can give material things, your time, skills, or anything else.

Get out of the habit of thinking that you should receive something first before you give. That is not giving. That is an exchange.

Giving freely and cheerfully enables you to do business, if you wish to look at it that way, with the Universe. This is how it works: You give someone something that you have now with you - freely and cheerfully. The Universe, by the law, finds the best way to give back that energy to you in the form of something that you do not have with you. it gives you back in multiples, when it is most appropriate, in the most appropriate form. It is a magical process. Obviously, the more you give, the more magic you create for yourself. Life starts to work for you.

Develop a strong desire and persistence to give cheerfully and freely.

In your goal setting, remember to include several goals that are about free and cheerful giving.

Giving, under the law of cause and effect, is one of the most powerful actions you can take.

It returns in multiples, sevenfold. You cannot afford to leave out giving in your life plan. You cannot afford to leave it to chance occurrence.

Develop giving into a habit, something you do naturally without having to think of it. This makes you into a consistent and persistent giver and the Universe will work for you.

Give spontaneously.

Work on the habit of giving until you get to the point where you enjoy giving. Enjoy it thoroughly.

It is ok to think and know that when you give you will get back something from the Universe. You do not have to pretend you are not interested in receiving a reward for giving.

Expecting reward is good. In fact, expecting a reward is empowering a reward to come to you.

The violation of the law of giving comes when you start expecting to receive something back from the same being you give to, saying "Well, I did this for you so you should do that for me." In fact demanding a particular reward back is a violation. It makes you "trading" minded rather than "cheerful and free giving" minded. Never ask for or expect payback" from those you give to. The reward you receive will come from a source and a time and in a form that the Universe finds best suited for you.

You always have something to give. Time, complements, talent, money, knowledge, share a book, etc.

Giving has one bonus effect: it shows you what you have but did not know you had. Say you wished to have wealth. You then decide to give wealth first by helping others learn how to have wealth. You read books such as these, help where you can with such knowledge, share these kind of books, and so on. In that process, magically, you end up realizing you had a whole lot of wealth and wealth capabilities that you previously thought you lacked.

You are surrounded with abundant opportunities to give, but you only see them when you decide to start seeing them.

Learn also to receive graciously and happily. Do not feel uncomfortable receiving. You deserve it and by receiving, you are in harmony with the law of giving and receiving.

The trick to giving is to not force it upon those you give to.Offer your gift freely and cheerfully. Show your hand. Do not shove. Show. If the receiver does not wish to take your gift, respect that cheerfully. Do not get offended if your gift is not accepted. Allow the other person their full nature of freedom of choice. And do not make a person dependent on you. When a person becomes dependent on your gifts unnecessarily, you have not done them any good because you have reduced their belief and ability in themselves.

Here is a likely scenario. Imagine a person who does not have much in material possessions to give and share with others. But this person is very charming and kind. The person gives a thousand compliments to people he or she comes across without even getting one compliment back. This person uplifts their mood and confidence by finding ways to encourage and compliment them. But this person never gets a compliment back from anybody. Well, not to worry. The Universe keeps its accounts perfectly. This person’s giving builds credit in the universal system. One day, by the law of cause and effect, of giving and receiving, this person somehow gets the bicycle he or she has always wanted -just when the person needed it - in a way that looks like a miracle. It could be by winning some competition, or having it given to them by a stranger, or one of a countless other possibilities, what people call luck. That is how giving works. Sometime the Universe takes little things that you have, can give, and do give, and it puts them into one big thing that you do not have and require and it gives that to you at a perfect time.

All other things held constant, to the extent that an individual or society shares and gives in the right way, so will they have wealth and happiness. Now you know how to do business with the Universe, so to speak.


The Universe itself is a giving Universe, for life is for giving. You give and you receive sevenfold – you actually are rewarded for your kindness. The Source, Life, is all about giving, and the intelligence that runs the Universe honors your giving always, all ways. Give cheerfully! Everything in life is a gift. Especially with regard to wealth and happiness, never cease to cause others to have wealth and happiness, and you will have wealth and happiness in multiples! But what goes with giving? Receiving. And what goes with that? Gratitude...Let's have a look at that tomorrow.

In the mean time make this commitment.

I will put the Law of Giving into effect by making a commitment to take the following steps:

1. Wherever I go, and whomever I encounter, I will bring them a gift. The gift may be a compliment, a flower, or a prayer. Today, I will give something to everyone I come into contact with, and so I will begin the process of circulating joy, wealth and affluence in my life and in the lives of others.

2. Today I will gratefully receive all the gifts that life has to offer me. I will receive the gifts of nature: sunlight and the sound of birds singing, or spring showers or the first snow of winter. I will also be open to receiving from others, whether it be in the form of a material gift, money, a compliment or a prayer.

3. I will make a commitment to keep wealth circulating in my life by giving and receiving life’s most precious gifts: the gifts of caring, affection, appreciation and love. Each time I meet someone, I will silently wish them happiness, joy and laughter.

James Boehm

Killer Prospecting

What I want everyone to do right now is to think back to the day you taught your child to ride their bike? Or the day your parents taught you…

Did you or your parents engage in the art of selling on that day? Of course, and do you recall the one and only question you had? There was only thing that had to be proven? CAN I DO IT.
I realize that life is still in the way, and for some of you and that I’m asking you to plow through less than ideal circumstances in order to begin implementing these skills, I’m asking you to understand that peace comes from success, and success comes from action, based on strength, conviction or belief, and skill.

Everything you’ve learned since you began working online were in preparation of you beginning the process of writing your story, the story of your success, and in order to break through, you must first break down, most people are victims of self doubt, self imposed fears, negativity, and in order to succeed you have to get this garbage out of the way first. We have heard many people say fake it till you make it, and what this translates to is lie until you create your story, but before you do that ask yourself this question Do I have to have a story BEFORE I build my business, or activity? The answer is nope, all you have to have is a true heart.

One other thing before we get started, My partner and my testimonials aren’t worth salt, people will see our history in the industry and immediately begin to segregate us based on experience and successes , people will simply disregard their potential and say well, that’s them, and create the exception rather than the rule. But Your testimonials are gold, pay dirt, worth more than anything I could ever say or do, but you aren’t going to fake it till you make it, we are going to create your testimonials based on results.

Effective prospecting is not one simple approach to selling, it is a very complex program, and one must understand the psychology of prospecting to do it effectively.

I never ever stress about when I’m going to begin, stories of other people enrolling 1 or 5 or 10 don’t phase me at all, they make me smile, I’m always glad to see other people experiencing success, but in truth, I know I convert qualified prospects at 90 plus percent, and I know why, because I know how. And I will teach you how also.

These lessons have been consolidated into a three part series when I delivered this training before it was a 10 part series, within these lessons I will validate one primary thing , and that is that you have to find success. The things I’m going to share with you will most likely not be like anything anyone ever told you before, I always say whatever I deliver is take it or leave it information, keep what feels right to you, this time I’m going to ask you to trust me, trust what I say, and why I say it. I’m going to ask you to ask me any question you like, whether it be based on an idea you have to get you where you need to be, a fear that you think may be holding your back, whatever fear you may have because for the hour or so we are specifically addressing psychological barriers to prospecting success.

So you’re learning to ride a bike, and your parents are engaging in the art of selling, you only have one question, the most important question, CAN I DO IT. Write that down, with a question mark, can I do it? Never ever forget that question.

Do you recall what trickery your parents used that day? One minute their running along behind the seat, holding on, and your peddling away as fast as you can because why? I mean you don’t know if you can do it, even if they have spent hours coaxing you, hours telling you, you can do it, you still don’t know because you never agreed that you could, they never proved that you could but you trusted them, and what did they do? They let go…they proved to you that you could do it…and you rode…Can I do it, and the answer is yes you can, can we do it, yes we can, does that sound familiar, of course it does the President of the united states, as a Candidate engaged in the art of selling. The very first time I saw the sign, that said “Yes we can” I knew it was the winning line, because I had employed the exact same tactic for years and it worked 90 plus percent of the time…

CAN I DO IT…
The very first thing you have to learn about effective prospecting is you have only one thing to sell, forget, about the product, forget about the website, forget about the presentation, but never forget your prospect has only one question, there is only one thing you must accomplish in this call, and that is you must answer that question, which is by the way, the one question every prospect has, and the one question none of them will ever ask, it is an unspoken law, answer the question, get the sale. Your success lies in the answer,

Can you know too much? So many people do not actively engage in prospecting, because they believe they won’t do it right, or they don’t know enough, remember this, the more you know, the less you win.

Let me tell you why, isn’t it amazing that the one thing that has been holding you back, is the one thing that will cost you the sale.

When prospecting, from the first syllable to the last, you are being heard, your prospect is listening to what you say, and more importantly how you say it ( which we will cover in another lesson) , but all the while they have the one question, can I do it? If you go way out in left field comp plan, matrixes etc , you will begin to lose the sale, will you sound like an expert, of course but you begin to create distance between yourself and your prospect, because you are answering the question, and you seem to know so much, your prospect is beginning to doubt whether or not they could ever know that much, they are thinking about all they have to learn, all they have to do, you are saying things they don’t understand, and they are checking the list, matrix? I don’t know what a matrix is, what does that mean? You are answering the question can I do it, with too much knowledge.

Remember the answer to both questions is always the same,
If the answer to the question can I do it? Is no then the answer to will you join my business or activity is also no.

If the answer to the question can I do it is yes, then the answer to will you join my business or activity is also yes.

We will of course never ask anyone to join our business, or participate in our activity never ever, we don’t ask that question, and I’ll share more on the reason why too.

We’ve been talking about the one question every prospect has, the one that they never ask, yet you are required to answer in order to get the sale Every time. And that was “Can I Do It “ and we have learned the answer must always be yes.

You might be thinking perhaps it is as easy as saying “You can do this” or “anyone can do this” and on one hand this is true, but it’s how you say it that counts in the end. We always say it without saying it; it’s less of a pitch and much more effective this way. Remember saying anything doesn’t make it so, it becomes truth through validation that occurs in your prospects mind, you don’t sell anyone, they have to sell themselves, we are not in the business of selling, we are in the business of presenting, we are information brokers by trade.

We have talked about becoming an expert, and I also said that it is quite possible to oversell or over present your opportunity, and cost yourself a sale by being the expert, so how does the whole thing balance out.

I’m going to explain it like this, becoming an expert on the Industry, which when dealing with a prospect amazingly enough has zero affect on the question they have, because they never make a connection between what you happen to know about the industry and anything that they would be required to learn, they will only ever assess whether or not they can learn specifically about the model, the very thing that you represent, so in a sense there are several things that happen when you become an industry expert, one you validate that you really know what the problem is, which says to your prospect if you know what the problem is, then you must know where the solution lies, and you must realize how to solve it, this is the first positive ping on the mental check list of your prospect. Remember 99% of the people you speak to are NOT first time lookers, and they are very well aware of the challenges, have already evaluated themselves out of network marketing as a result of what they have seen and heard so far, the answer they have gotten to the question can I do it? Is a resounding no! Then in walks the master prospector, it’s important to note one thing here, master prospecting skills are never ever about how many people you recruit, never, because anyone can plow through the numbers, it is about conversion only, how many you enroll per number of conversations, anything less than 1 in 5 which is one enrollment per 5 conversations should send you back to prospecting school. That should be the goal, does it mean you start out that way? Absolutely not, but it does mean that you are learning as you go, and your conversions per conversation should be getting higher and higher, it could be 1 in 20, one enrollment per 20 conversations starting out, you should then be striving for 1 in 10, but enrolling 25 in 400 conversations would be a total bust, it’s always about conversion, as long as you are monitoring conversion you are constantly honing your skills. Now on to becoming an expert

Example: Well Mary you know statistically 98% of the people that enter into a home based business opportunity fail, (do not fear saying this you are actually validating yourself and your activity or company, and I guarantee your prospect already knows this.) That’s why when I saw the perfect gift plan model I was so impressed, Mary knowing how challenging it is for the average person to ever make any decent money on the Internet I immediately saw an opportunity where anyone could succeed, this would be a great time to talk about how easy it is. You will also want to add as an expert that most all network marketing companies will require you to enroll or sponsor 100’s and 100’s of people to ever make any good income, problem 2, master prospector solution, all we will ever ask you to do Mary is sponsor two people. Just two participants, people like yourself that you know could use more cash in their lives not only that but we are a group of individuals who truly care about others, and for us it’s not all about the money it’s about having a plan that will actually help people without the challenges, we have a plan that solves the industry problem, and changes the statistics, it’s not only possible for people to receive in abundance, it’s probable, I guess I have to say Mary that is the number one thing that attracted me to this activity. People are looking for a plan that will work for them, without having to conquer the learning curve that most opportunities would require before you can succeed, with our plan you could be receiving cash today

Now in the course of this short example we have covered three problem areas in the industry, and we did it ethically intact without naming names, or being less than professional, we did it from the position of industry expert, without making the prospect feel as though they could never do what you just did.

Now let me tell you what just happened in a 30 second conversation, In this example we would be very near accomplishing everything that we need in order to close this sale, these are the things that occurred,

1)We showed compassion towards people
2)We edified our activity
3)We proved we knew what was wrong in our industry
4)We solidified our commitment to change that
5)We removed all doubt that this is like all the rest
6)We sold its simplicity all you need is two
7)We sold our mission to help others
8)We showed them it was possible to get what they came for which is money…today
9)We were experts without intimidating our prospect
10)And most importantly we are well on our way to answering Mary’s one and only question. Can I Do It?

The next step is going to be covering the plan, and how it works or helping Mary understand that she can get what she needs here, and you don’t have to break it down, the website and the Movie can do that for you.

The one other thing we didn’t do is cover the cost or out of pocket, remember guys we are working with psychology here, after all of that, we need to give our prospect time to start assessing the possible costs…

Ideally the meter is running and they are thinking, if you presented correctly Mary will be thinking that it has to be 400.00 500.00 maybe more, based on what she’s heard from others while researching home based business.

In the example above we presented, any prospect who feels they are being sold, will resist mainly because they don’t want to sell, if you sell, they feel like they have to, remember they are listening, they are qualifying themselves every step of the way (can I do what he/she is doing). We have one job, and that is to present them with information, in the example we did it eloquently professionally without threat, or discomfort, we simply provided the information they needed to answer the only question they have. Your Job is to present, your goal to answer the question. Never sell anything, you have nothing to sell.

In the first half of our training we discussed that can I do it, is the one question you must answer in every conversation about your business. We also talked about becoming the expert, and NOT over selling your opportunity or activity, making sure that everything you do throughout your presentation comes across as something your prospect can see themselves doing, presenting with simplicity.

I am trying to deliver this information in order of importance, and in this last part we’re going to discuss “planning your work day” which you could call “achieving balance” or creating a structured work environment.

So why is this so important, it’s important because becoming disciplined and organized are key to your success. You cannot allow your business to run you, you must run your business.
The key to achieving all of these things is in the way you schedule your day. It’s going to be impossible for me to schedule it for you, since I don’t know what you can do when. All I can do is lay out a perfectly structured day as an example, and then hope that you guys can follow suit around your own circumstances.

So the first step to structuring your days would be to determine what you have to do as part of your daily ritual, and what time you typically do this. Example: If your kids get on the Bus at 7:30 then that is not part of your work structure.

We always build our business around life, NOT the othe5r way around, the other way will not work, you will never find balance, and a lot of bad things can occur if you try to build your life around business.

So ask yourself this question “When can I work”? This is the first thing you need to know, then block out the hours when you are taking care of life. Unless you have a fairly regular schedule you may want to create your schedule weekly, but once you make your work schedule stick to it, this is where discipline comes in. If you know you need to mow the lawn Tuesday morning, then obviously Tuesday morning gets blocked out.

This is so important because you need to be able to function without the stress of unfinished tasks, and without the guilt that can come from neglecting certain aspects of your life, you have to be free to work. This does not mean that you are going to work one hour a week, because if you do it simply won’t produce the results you are looking for, however one hour a week can be reserved for a certain task in relation to work.

Remember, what we talked about last week, your job is to present, you are an information broker, so this is essentially a process that you go through routinely, and you should do it repetitiously, do the same thing over and over again. With minor variations based on the differences that may be found from one prospect to another, other than that what you do is always the same, this way you get better and better at your game.

Get organized, I cannot stress this enough, if you don’t have a day planner, get one, it’s your prospecting bible. In my case, my day goes like this, I start work at 9:00 AM, and I begin by looking at my planner, which is actually an appointment book, this works best for me.
My Prospecting days are scheduled like this, from 9:00 to 12:00 I am making first calls, whether or not they are leads, people who have visited my website or whatever the case may be, first calls are made from 9:00-Noon. At noon, I have some lunch. Then from roughly 12:30 to 2:00 this is admin time, during these hours, I send emails to anyone that I spoke to that would possibly recap what we talked about and include an invitation to attend a call, I mainly have prospecting days on call days, and should you choose you could very well prospect all day on call days and reserve the following day for follow up.

On prospecting day you are making calls in the morning, I use Melissa Data to verify time zone so that I don’t call anyone at 7:00 in the morning, and try to call everyone after 9:00-9:30 AM, and never after 5:30-6:00 at night unless they ask me to.

So I make my calls, present, and let them know I will be sending them an email in the next few hours which contains the information they need to attend an overview call, remember I’m not selling, I’m brokering information, and these calls are part of that process. At this time I’m going to schedule a follow up call, typically I say “Mary after you have had a chance to attend the over view call I’d like to call you back so that I can answer any questions you might have, If it’s Tuesday then I want to call her back no later than Wednesday, some will instruct you to call them back immediately after the call, and this can work if your goal is to emotionally sell them, rather than have them join you from a place of intelligence, remember we want to enroll fewer people who create a stronger foundation rather than a lot who will buy emotionally and quit as a result of buyers remorse, so give them a day to think things through, in our case we have nothing to hide, and should not fear allowing them time to further their due diligence process, now if your prospect is going to visit the scam boards and find a bunch of garbage about your business, then we will address that later on, either by becoming an experts on why it is people post those items, and helping our prospects understand that scam, boards are nothing more than marketing platforms, and there is little or no value to them in making a sound business decision, because everyone posting is a network marketer. Or we will close them more quickly, but we’ll talk about those things another day. “ so Mary What time Wednesday afternoon is best for you? Say it like this because Mary wants all the time she can get before you ask her for money or she has to make a decision, so if you say what is a good day, she will likely say anytime next week, which will never work, because you have to spend your whole call reminding her who you are and why you are calling and so on. Write your appointment in your book. Wednesday after you have made Wednesday calls you know who you have to follow up with and what time they want you to call. Be on time the first time, it’s ok to tell Bob that you really need to run because you have another appointment in order to stay on schedule.

There is one other thing that I do, I use a contact sheet which is nothing more than a document that I print out, that has my prospects name email and phone, and a place for notes, when I hang up every call, or finish every conversation I write down anything important that my prospect told me, for instance why they need a home based business, what they do now, etc. This way when I call her back I remember or appear to remember what we talked about which scores big with your prospects, lets them know they matter. Then I slide the sheets into the planner, and before I dial the number I go back over notes of what they said, this way it is comfortable and is simply a continuation of the previous call.

However it is that you choose to organize and structure your business would be up to you, and would depend on your daily schedule, but just make sure you do it, and it’s structured so that you are not bouncing all over the place, when you are prospecting, that is all you are doing, when you follow up, that is all you are doing, and when you are closing THAT is all you are doing, you will hone your skills, and get better and better by taking this approach and it will also help you to eliminate any discomfort you may have. My partner sometimes says I am a Recruiting Machine, and it’s not that so much as the fact no one gets away, I use a flawless prospecting system that is driven by organization, it’s all part of a process and I never lose track of where I am in the process with any one prospect, I can lay my hands on the place I left off in a matter of seconds, so if my phone rings and Mary says “ Lori this is Mary Smith we spoke yesterday and last night I went to the call, by the time she introduces herself and tries to remind me, I am prepared to ease her discomfort by acknowledging that not only do I remember her, but I recall all of the details, again, you big score when you can do this. So the third most important thing in the process of becoming a master prospector is get organized, develop your system, and use it.

Here's the real truth behind the success of every top income earner in the industry ....work your tail off!!

Working your tail off means doing all the things everyone else won't do, so you can live the life everyone else doesn't have. It means attending ALL of your company and team opportunity and training calls. Working your tail off means finding out who is making it happen and duplicating exactly what they do. It means doing all the repetitive, boring things that breed success over and over and over again until you make it big.

So, what are the things we SHOULD NOT be doing? The following is a list of items we see so many people doing wrong in this industry. If you want to be successful in network marketing you need to consistently work hard and avoid the following 7 pitfalls:

1. Selling and Presenting Your BusinessWe see so many people in this industry trying to sell and talk people into joining their business. That might work if we wanted them to buy a refrigerator from us. The problem with selling people into your network marketing business is that they are not making a "buying" decision. They are making a working decision. Your job is not to convince people that your business is a great opportunity. Your job is to find those people who are searching for your opportunity and upon finding it will do something about it. In a nutshell, you are looking for the “get it done and then some” kind of people.

Utilize your company and team leader's conference calls & websites to do the selling and presenting for you. In simplest terms, let the tools do 90% of the work. That leaves you free to concentrate on the personal part of network marketing ... cultivating relationships, interviewing and choosing the right people.

Never forget that you are looking for serious, motivated, committed people who are ready to do business right now. If you try to sell people, you will end up spending 99% of your time trying to push the wrong people to do the work. The bottom line is, we are in the lifestyle consulting & development business, not sales.

2. Making Income Claims

How many times have you heard how much money the big "Guru" in a network marketing company is making? That may be very well and good, but what does it have to do with how much you will make or how much your prospect will earn with your company? The answer is absolutely nothing. You, your team members and potential prospects could make more or less than the top earner. So, why do so many networkers make income claims when talking to a potential candidate for their business? The answer goes back to Pitfall #1. They are trying to impress and ultimately sell their prospect into the business.

So, if we shouldn't be making income claims, how do we make sure our prospects have a strong understanding of the income potential of doing business with us? The answer is simple. Instead of telling them how much you or someone else in your company makes, present them with a simple business plan they can understand. For example, if sponsoring 10 who sponsor 10 who sponsor 10, will create a six figure income, then that is your sample business plan. Make sure they understand that once they complete the plan, they will be earning the desired income.

Always put the focus on what THEY need to do to make money, not what someone else has done.

3. Three-Waying Prospects Into Opportunity Calls

It never ceases to amaze us how many network marketers will 3-way a prospect into an opportunity call. Think about it. What message is this sending your prospect? It's simple, desperation. Instead of interviewing and making your prospect qualify for your time, you are again back to Pitfall #1, trying to sell someone on your business. Instead, make the attendance of your conference call a qualifier.

See it as the same way you would conduct a job interview. If you were interviewing a candidate for the board of directors of your business, would you drive to their house, pick them up and bring them back to your office? Of course you wouldn't. Sounds pretty silly when we put it that way, doesn't it? Your network marketing business is no different. You are the CEO of your company. You only have time to work with a few serious, motivated and dedicated individuals. If they won't take 25-30 minutes to learn about your business, then quite frankly, you don't want them.

4. Being Too Enthusiastic
Being excited about your business is a very good thing. However, displaying a bunch of over-the-top excitement during an interview call is going to more than likely turn your prospect off, off, off. If you are too enthusiastic when speaking with them, their first thought will probably be that you're about to pitch them on something. Be confident and excited about what you have to offer, but stay away from words like awesome, incredible, amazing, fantastic, easy, great, "you’re going to love this", etc.

5. Not Disqualifying

As we said earlier, smart people invest their time in the serious, motivated people who see the vision and are ready to do business now. So, how can we be sure we’re disqualifying the people that aren’t right for our business? One of the most important things you can do is make a list of the qualities you’re looking for and post it in sight of the area you make your phone calls at. At any time you feel like your prospect is not right for the business, simply let them know. Say something like, "I appreciate your time, but this doesn't sound like something that's for you right now. Why don't we keep in touch by email and if something changes you can give me a call."

Always leave the ball in their court. It's like a game of tennis. Every time they hit the ball back to you, you do the same. Literally – put the ball back into their court. Make them responsible for their actions so you’re spending your time with the right people. Don’t ever hit the ball over the net twice without getting it back first. If you do, you will just burn yourself out.

6. Not focusing on people’s pain – Not solving problems

Too many networkers focus only on getting a prospect information about their business, without learning anything about what the prospect is looking for and why. When speaking with prospects, ask exploratory questions that reveal their values, goals & desires. Really listen and care about what they have to say. The more you understand your prospect, the better you can assist them in getting what they want. Focus on how your business can be a solution to the challenges they're facing. They are interested in what joining your business can do for them, not how "great" and "incredible" it is.

7. Focusing on Details
There are two types of details we are talking about here. The first is the details of your business when talking with prospects. Don't get into long winded discussions about the background of your company. Stop yourself from going on and on about the evolution of the product line or the details of your marketing system. You, of course, want to answer questions. However, the time and place for that is after your prospect has been on a call and read through your website. Once they've done that, answer their questions in a short but informative way. Don't let yourself get side tracked from the topic or over load them with too much information.

The second type of details we're talking about is the details of planning your work. Want to waste 2 hours? Go into your office for 5 minutes. Leaders focus the bulk of their time on result related activities & delegate out everything else. 90% of your time should be spent on phone calls and training your team members. Organizing your business is considered "busy work" and does not count towards the time you need to put in to be successful.

There’s two important things I can say, if you aren’t willing to work for it, you don’t need it. It’s called working from home for a reason, second if you don’t believe you should leave, because in order to achieve your goals you have to believe 100% in what you are doing or every person you talk to will see right through that, and you couldn’t sponsor anyone if your life depended on it, that is a fact.

James Boehm